Flowersong
02-02-2010, 11:20 PM
Hi, :D
I feel the need to introduce myself now. I had wanted to read all the threads in this forum but now I’m overwhelmed and there is still so much to be read, that could take at least a week of intense reading. I should tell you about me first. I was born in Holland (Amsterdam) but since about 2 years I've lived in Canada.
All my life I wanted to do something spiritual although I call myself an atheist because I don’t like the fact I was christened a Protestant (I was a baby but I can remember it being a very traumatic experience, honestly: I saw my mother standing over me smiling, I was scared, crying, and my mother saying it was alright, this stranger leaning over. Don’t make fun of me; I know the leading opinion is that no-one remembers anything from before 3 years of age. I just do remember this very vividly.
So, I didn’t like church, I didn’t like reading the bible and I still don’t like to read it now. I started reading the bible and the koran just to know what I don’t like about them but after the first few pages it just gets me very down. Also all the devoted commentaries others write and say about these religions, they make me feel sick. But I think everyone should do and believe what they want as long as they don’t bother me (or anyone else).
So I don’t like the RHP very much either as that goes on and on about ‘loving fathers and gods’ and so on. I am very suspicious of people telling me what is good and loving. :yes:
I’ve read and tried a lot of things: I-Ching, Tarot, Castaneda, Yoga, T’ai Chi, Taoism, meditation and so on and so on. I enjoy and can relate to the Satanic bible by A. Lavey, although I don’t like the fact that he doesn’t believe in an afterlife. I want to believe I have a chance of my consciousness surviving even if it is for yet another life on earth (although I’m bound to be throw into some sort of evil society where they practice girl-circumcision, as I always tend to make my life as difficult as I possibly can for myself). So I’m not much of a Satanist (if Laveyans are what they claim to be they enjoy life, make wealth and do nothing but lesser magic to get as much out of life as they can). I did try to do a ritual but I probably conjured up a Pikachu from the Cartoon network or something. It was pathetic. I do have a sacred place in my meditative state and had two mummified corpses that used to greet me with their presence (but said nothing) but since my ritual I could finally tell them to leave (and at last they stayed gone) and they were replaced by a very helpful male figure I have conversations with, drinking expensive wine, nibbling soft cheese together, I am a lot less lonely. He does seem to be just a smart side of me though, no great Knowledge is yet been delivered through him.:o_O:
I have been doing a lot of online research on the Temple of Set. I think the writings about lesser magic from Don Webb are very interesting. But they give no information on their greater magic with their deity Set. And that is what I want. I want to talk to a wise and friendly deity who can advise me on my path. I have read your threads regarding the RHP and the LHP, they are very interesting. Although I missed the third option (described by the Dragon Rouge order): they describe three different options to choose from: 1. the light, the obvious choice of the RHP (according to them you can choose to stay there, it is permanent though); 2. The dark (the womb of Kali) (you can stay here, also a permanent choice); or 3. (which is, I think, the path commonly known to be the goal of the LHP: the leap into a separate Isolate Being, roaming free, in a state also known as ‘the Great Unknown’. No idea about the practical side of these endeavors but it has left me wondering which choice I would make if I had to face these different destinations, especially since I guess the 3rd choice means physical death (as it wouldn’t be very mysterious after the first one came back to talk about it some more).
Anyway, no chance I will be joining any organized club anytime soon anyway.
I like the Luciferian philosophy (I found it through this forum, actually I found it before but never got passed the homepage) but I still have a problem with the angels and all the goodness and devotion that is in the ritual of the pentagram (as I said I am very suspicious), nor do I like the idea of urgency as one has only this lifetime otherwise the soul is doomed to dissolve into the great Reservoir of Souls to be recycled into another soul or eighty, that’s very depressing.
The first thing I will do is read T. Karlsson – Qabalah, Qlipoth and Goetic magic, which all of you here seem to have read, if only to understand what your talking about. And then I hope to be a bit more intellugent :laugh:
I feel the need to introduce myself now. I had wanted to read all the threads in this forum but now I’m overwhelmed and there is still so much to be read, that could take at least a week of intense reading. I should tell you about me first. I was born in Holland (Amsterdam) but since about 2 years I've lived in Canada.
All my life I wanted to do something spiritual although I call myself an atheist because I don’t like the fact I was christened a Protestant (I was a baby but I can remember it being a very traumatic experience, honestly: I saw my mother standing over me smiling, I was scared, crying, and my mother saying it was alright, this stranger leaning over. Don’t make fun of me; I know the leading opinion is that no-one remembers anything from before 3 years of age. I just do remember this very vividly.
So, I didn’t like church, I didn’t like reading the bible and I still don’t like to read it now. I started reading the bible and the koran just to know what I don’t like about them but after the first few pages it just gets me very down. Also all the devoted commentaries others write and say about these religions, they make me feel sick. But I think everyone should do and believe what they want as long as they don’t bother me (or anyone else).
So I don’t like the RHP very much either as that goes on and on about ‘loving fathers and gods’ and so on. I am very suspicious of people telling me what is good and loving. :yes:
I’ve read and tried a lot of things: I-Ching, Tarot, Castaneda, Yoga, T’ai Chi, Taoism, meditation and so on and so on. I enjoy and can relate to the Satanic bible by A. Lavey, although I don’t like the fact that he doesn’t believe in an afterlife. I want to believe I have a chance of my consciousness surviving even if it is for yet another life on earth (although I’m bound to be throw into some sort of evil society where they practice girl-circumcision, as I always tend to make my life as difficult as I possibly can for myself). So I’m not much of a Satanist (if Laveyans are what they claim to be they enjoy life, make wealth and do nothing but lesser magic to get as much out of life as they can). I did try to do a ritual but I probably conjured up a Pikachu from the Cartoon network or something. It was pathetic. I do have a sacred place in my meditative state and had two mummified corpses that used to greet me with their presence (but said nothing) but since my ritual I could finally tell them to leave (and at last they stayed gone) and they were replaced by a very helpful male figure I have conversations with, drinking expensive wine, nibbling soft cheese together, I am a lot less lonely. He does seem to be just a smart side of me though, no great Knowledge is yet been delivered through him.:o_O:
I have been doing a lot of online research on the Temple of Set. I think the writings about lesser magic from Don Webb are very interesting. But they give no information on their greater magic with their deity Set. And that is what I want. I want to talk to a wise and friendly deity who can advise me on my path. I have read your threads regarding the RHP and the LHP, they are very interesting. Although I missed the third option (described by the Dragon Rouge order): they describe three different options to choose from: 1. the light, the obvious choice of the RHP (according to them you can choose to stay there, it is permanent though); 2. The dark (the womb of Kali) (you can stay here, also a permanent choice); or 3. (which is, I think, the path commonly known to be the goal of the LHP: the leap into a separate Isolate Being, roaming free, in a state also known as ‘the Great Unknown’. No idea about the practical side of these endeavors but it has left me wondering which choice I would make if I had to face these different destinations, especially since I guess the 3rd choice means physical death (as it wouldn’t be very mysterious after the first one came back to talk about it some more).
Anyway, no chance I will be joining any organized club anytime soon anyway.
I like the Luciferian philosophy (I found it through this forum, actually I found it before but never got passed the homepage) but I still have a problem with the angels and all the goodness and devotion that is in the ritual of the pentagram (as I said I am very suspicious), nor do I like the idea of urgency as one has only this lifetime otherwise the soul is doomed to dissolve into the great Reservoir of Souls to be recycled into another soul or eighty, that’s very depressing.
The first thing I will do is read T. Karlsson – Qabalah, Qlipoth and Goetic magic, which all of you here seem to have read, if only to understand what your talking about. And then I hope to be a bit more intellugent :laugh: